Monday, June 14, 2010

Drop your socks and grab your crocs, we're about to get wet on this ride.

It’s been a busy couple of weeks and I know there’s countless reviews up already and I have seen these movies weeks ago but I have been wanting to write a review about them so here it goes.

You don’t like it? Well tough shit.


Iron Man 2.

I seem to be a bit in the minority here, especially when it comes to the people around me but I was kinda disappointed with the entire thing. Yes, I had low expectations, yes I realize most of the time you cannot duplicate that same chemistry and “it” factor that something like the first Iron Man managed--especially with all the pressure of following up that juggernaut of a film.

I get all that.

And yet, I was still disappointed.

Yes it exploded, yes it had summer blockbuster written all over it. Yes, Robert Downey Jr. is amazing. He is Tony Stark. And I will admit to the nerdgasm when he puts on the briefcase suit for the first time.

It was sexy.

Unfortunately for me, the movie lived up more to my worry than to everyone else’s expectations. The movie seemed way too fractured. Not only are we introducing new characters (hello an amazing looking Scarlett Johansson, who had all the personality of cardboard--but really /hot/ cardboard), a tie in with a new franchise (Samuel L Jackson as... Samuel L Jackson), the bad guy(s), the health problems plot and the typical sidekick. Unfortunately all this left me with a decidedly disjointed story line and while it -almost- works, a lot of it felt too rushed or too easy of a problem solve. 

I would have adored it if we cut out maybe two plots and just focused on expanding and fleshing out the story lines they already had. I mean, it wasn't until Scarlett Johansson showed up that I could truly appreciate Gwyneth Paltrow's subtle charm and chemistry that she had with RDJ.  

All and all... was it fun? Yes--well sorta. The only reason this movie worked was Robert Downey Jr.’s amazing chemistry, charm and charisma. Seriously, his DnD character would have insane charisma. I know of people who would probably hang around just to watch him read the telephone book. (I may be one of them)

Unfortunately all that pretty and all that charm didn’t manage to make me love it, although I will give it to them:

They sure know how to build up excitement for the next one.

Prince of Persia.

As I said on twitter, there was not enough shirtless Jake Gyllenhaal to make this movie worth anything.

While he managed to be a charming enough lead, between the wavering accent and like I said, the not enough shirtless-ness (I swear, I’m not a perv--I blame G), it wasn’t enough to save this cookie-cutter of a movie. The dialogue was cliche and induced many eyerolls/groans, the plot was flimsy at best and all you could do was sit down and watch. And then five seconds upon leaving the theatre? Forget all about it.

Even the action sequences couldn’t muster much with it’s dumbed down and un-bloodied Disney-fied version. The love story was gagful and inevitable and I get that she’s a priestess and all and therefore doesn’t have much combat skills but COME ON WOMAN, you had him by surprise and you stop a foot away from him so that your precious prince can save you.

Please.

Man up.

I’d write more about this movie but a week after seeing it I cannot muster much more than I’ve already written. See? Forgettable.

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